2.37AM

To even re-enact the scene of you and her which Z told me about, is enough to disgust me. It's fucking disgusting.

This lie is incredibly perfect. How could I have forgotten this has all along been your forte. How foolish was I to believe the things you said? How ignorant was I to be hoping for something which was merely a fallacy? I honestly do not know how I should be feeling. Everything doesn't seem to make sense and I'm too overwhelmed by this entire shit. Why must you do this to me? Why? It makes me feel so fucking worthless, absolutely insignificant to you.

I don’t know why am I still hanging on to something which I know I'll be better off letting it go.

"I get the whole 'He’s the only guy I’ve ever really been in love with' part. It’s hard to let go, hard to move on to someone else and think you’ll never find anyone with such characteristics or chemistry like you two had, but I promise you, once you let go and move on, you’ll find out that, deep down, the only feelings you have for him might be just the fact that you’ll always love him. You may not want him back, you might just be scared to move on without him."

It's true. I know, but how? Really, tell me how.

It's queer how my friends are enraged by what you've done to me but I'm still not feeling that strong resentment I should be feeling towards you. Do you know how terribly you've screwed me up? Not a single apology, is your ego really that huge or do you seriously not think that you're at fault?

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Friday @Zouk. Momentary happiness perhaps. If not, how else?

I need to find back my old self, I need to be me again.

Everyone's telling me I deserve way better.

I've lost faith in love.