Believing is deceiving

Post-party @ Zouk

Last Friday night

Ling's 21st!

Dearest girlfriends <333

Supper @ Substation with S & C

7sept; Last day of work @ CIMB

Brownie dear

Late night bowling

@ Flam's

Jagerbombs @ 4am

Supper @ Swee Choon

Guess who's sleeping

Last Saturday @ Winebar

Tequila shots @ Butter

Too many happenings lately. Drama after drama. Sometimes I still wonder why things happened the way they did.

I'm feeling another round of emotion turbulence once more. Why does it hit me so often? I don’t want a thousand feelings and not knowing what I want. Too confused and distraught. I don’t need and I don’t want to go through another round of shit. Maybe all that I need to do is to control those feelings. Control. I can’t let them run. It's too dangerous. Those walls, those barriers, I can't just tear them down yet. All I know is I've to guard myself. I don't want to be wrong about this again. I don’t know if this is worth believing. I really don’t. This is probably too transient to be true. It’s contradicting how I would and would not like to know where will this be leading me to. You probably don't really know what you want. You don't just go with your feelings. I'm telling you this is just transient, trust me.

3.37AM

"Never make permanent decisions on temporary feelings."

Do you honestly know what do you want? I'm not convinced. I'm afraid. Just too afraid. And right now, you know I can't.

To be continued.

Wednesday night at Butter with the girlsssssss!

I've at least 800 pictures to upload now. Goodness.

Over

#evening #toobored

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2am, crying while I'm typing this now. S made me listen to ‘Today my life begins’. It’s supposedly a cheery song but I’m in tears now. I know I’m over all those shit, I know I’m definitely over. I feel so absurd crying now. Am I crazy, seriously? Probably he's right, I’m just afraid to enter the next phase of life, a new phase of life. Summer is over and so are we.

Be tough, Tracy.


“I will break these chains that bind me, happiness will find me
Leave the past behind me, today my life begins
A whole new world is waiting it’s mine for the takin’
I know I can make it, today my life begins.”

Z, weekly.

All the crazy nights; that's what we called wild fun.♥

Dramatic has never been more true than what happened on Saturday night. Too eventful a night, really.

Gordon's dry in the bush.

[Afrojack - Can't stop me]
LOVING THIS.

If this was the last dance of the night, will you join me till the morning light?

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Let things remain this way. It may be nothing close to those picture perfect memories, it may not be how I wanted it to be, but I'm beginning to feel better off. Probably sometimes it really is just a matter of getting used to it and accepting the things you thought you never would. Kind of amazing. Now I truly believe in this: You're stronger than you seem, braver than you believe.